Failing and starting again. Again
I have started and set up my spiritual blogs several times now, the first nine years ago and part of me is kicking myself for not continuing on from that, building it up over the past nine years. By now I could have a large readership who likes and trusts me. Because of course when you are thinking about imaginary futures you are always successful, well unless you are doing some catastrophic thinking.
That puts me off of dedicating myself here to this blog again, because I have already failed. And part of that failure stems from the fact that I think I can only blog when my spiritual practice is strong and going well, that actually my life is going well.
And of course, that is just nonsense, because it is not true, my spiritual path has never been a smooth one, it is twisty, goes up and down and occasionally I fall into a ho-ho rather than ascending up the hill as I had intended.
Of course, that is just life, isn’t it? I have not reach enlightenment just yet and, without wishing to presume, I am going to make the assumption that you havent either, because otherwise why would you be reading this.
Over the last few years I have lost touch with my, dare I say it, mystical side. THe one who danced in the woods, sung at random points and enjoyed my connection with the divine. Of course that is rather what happens when you get incredibly sick, you lose your self. I’ve gotten myself pretty much well again, or at least as well as I ever will be, and I have rebuilt that self as an artist. I have a photography practice, both commercial and fine art, but I feel like I have been neglecting my mystical side, becoming very focused on the rational and logical. And so I want to recommit to that, part of which is sharing that journey, which is rather difficult as I am actually an introvert and private person.
But I am certain, I am sure that there are a lot of people like me out there, who have lost their way from their paths and want to head back to it and I hope that my writing will help. In addition writing helps me to sort things out in my own head too..