Liminal Luminous

a wandering, wondering space of devotion, creativity and freedom.
Disability/Chronic Illness/Mental health Living well

Not grasping…accepting

I am feeling well at the moment, this is a lovely feeling after being so sick, being exhausted and having a real depressive episode earlier in the year.

I’ve spent this morning pages trying to figure out how I can stay like this, how to capture the feeling and be able to call it back.

There are practical things I can do, I know for a fact now that I need my morning routine of yoga, meditation/prayer, morning pages and time to work on my creative projects. I also need time to go for long walks and swim several times a week too. Eating well always helps.

So, yes there are steps I can take.

More importantly I need to not grasp onto this feeling with a death grip, crushing the life out of it while I examine it, analyse it and try to keep hold of it.

By holding it lightly, giving thanks and enjoying the moment it is even more precious. And when I inevitably slip into pain or fatigue it won’t be such a crushing disappointment because I haven’t expected to stay like this.

I was feeling quite proud of myself for figuring out that this attitude was a much healthier one and it is a good way to live life when I laughed.

This is the whole point of non-attachment, a core tenant of Buddhism. It is accepting the moment as it is, for good or bad, not fighting it or wanting it to be otherwise. It is surrendering to the moment, rather than trying to maintain the illusion that I can control all of reality. Trying to control the whole of reality is futile and exhausting, a complete waste of energy and time. Yet, for some reason that seems to be a difficult lesson for me.

Being in the moment, as it is, with acceptance and compassion, is fundamental for a good life.

Yes, there are many things we can do to make sure that we are living well, with intention, but acceptance is key.

Now, of course, I just need to remember this and put it into practice.

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