Liminal Luminous

a wandering, wondering space of devotion, creativity and freedom.
creativity Living well Spirituality

Wondering

Oh, I struggle with this site, and once again the domain name is up for renewal and I wonder if I should bother paying out the £30 odd a year it takes to keep it up and running.

There is a part of me that would like to say ‘sod it’ and do all of my writing and sharing under my main website, however , as my work there is consultancy, professional photography and, coming soon, web development, it doesn’t seem right.

But then I wonder why do I bother writing here at all? What is my outcome from it? This thought process isn’t new, it goes in seasons. Like many others I am a seeker who processes by writing. I understand the world by reading and writing, feeling and writing, experiencing and writing.

I get through a journal every 6 weeks, and these are big chunky books with narrow lines and I have quite small handwriting. I agonise about how much time I spend in my journal, when I could be doing actual writing, like my novel, more posts here, or whatever…. Or doing any of my other creative things, music, painting, photography.

But it appears to be part of the process, my process of being in the world. And sharing some of that here helps. I love reading  memoir type stories, especially with those who struggle with faith. Those who struggle with being highly introverted, deeply sensitive, creative types. I think those of us who are like that, also like to read about others’ wandering wonderings.

There is also a part of me who is deeply called to be a mystic and a healer, while at the same time being quite off put at the whole idea of both of those concepts. I’ve always seen myself as more of a warrior than either of those, but I am learning the power of surrendering. Of not knowing. Of living the questions as Rilke says.

I don’t have the answers, to anything, and I think that is why I struggle with this site. I like clear cut things. For things to have a reason, a purpose, a structure, which this online space doesn’t have. It’s quite messy, I contradict myself. I don’t have a clearly defined label, and I want one…. Hmm.

I’m thinking about this – Liminal Luminous, a wandering, wondering space of devotion, creativity and freedom.

Not exactly succinct is it?

5 Comment

  1. I’m conscious of this struggle. A journey of writing is encumbering due to its immortality, and as the writer aesthesis dictates, the longer you walk along the path, the further your disconnect from the laden words behind.
    If my breathless approach has taught me anything, it is that of syphoning energy from those sparks of destruction we leave along the scarlet droplets of writing.
    Channel it into an Art, small impish fragments, not necessarily magnanimous works like novels or full narratives. Just small poems, or small proses, whatever you prefer.
    Become aware of how they end first, and let the pen lead you there.
    I’ve noticed that you have indexed your speech to your writing, probably due to years of personal flow, which lead you to write much akin to the way your thoughts stream.
    This is important, because it is mellifluous and unique, and it should be preserved. Perhaps just become aware of form before you spin the first phrases, and allow the fluidity to impact not only the melody of your words, but also, the form in which they present themselves.
    You have a new reader, I hope you will stick around.☺️

    1. Thank you for joining me here and for your kind words…. I do write in quite a stream of consiousness, but equally I do edit it too. I have done some small poems, I even exhibited some a couple of years ago, over laid on photos .

      where did you find me, can I ask?

      1. I scuttle around the silent basins of WordPress, reading stuff here and there. Sometimes I feel compelled to comment, when I notice a certain loneliness to the words. It isn’t always well-received, but it’s done with the best intentions.

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